#AnFWord is Time| Why I don’t wear a watch #4

#anFword is Time

An F Word (my Friday word of the week) over the last week/month/Year is time. Not enough, taking time, time out, me time, spending time, giving time.

I’m not going to even pretend I don’t find myself rushing round like a headless chicken – juggling deadlines, chores, time for fun.  But, we are getting into our groove as a single parent household, co parenting and making it work as best we can. With the help of our families and B’s grand parents who look after him whilst we’re at work.

Yes, I am back at work and that’s a big adjustment.  When I left to go on mat leave, I was part of a couple and I’ve come back single and mum to a gorgeous, energetic toddler!  As I mentioned in the post Self Love and Single Motherhood, it’s not what I envisaged, but we’re getting along OK!

Ain’t nobody got time!

I’ve been taking time out of blogging and vlogging to adjust, whilst travelling (for work) to far-flung glamorous locations like Normanton, Newcastle and Norwich, which you’ll have seen on Snapchat if you follow us there. I have to say, as much of an arse Norwich is to get to, that part of the world is really beautiful.

I ended up staying at the Dunston Hall Hotel. But, as has been the story, time and not wanting to drag myself from my B, meant I didn’t get there until midnight. So, it wasn’t until the morning that I could really appreciate how stunning the location is. Instead of my usual morning rush, I made time for a lovely breakfast in the stunning breakfast room, which was bathed in glorious sunshine with views over the gorgeous grounds.

I really hope next time I’m in Norwich, I’m there again. Next time, I’ll make time to enjoy the gym and the spa and perhaps even a round of golf. Who am I kidding? Ain’t nobody got time for golf!

Does time even matter? Why I don’t wear a watch

Here’s a little fact about me: I don’t wear a watch,  I haven’t for almost 20 years. I don’t hate watches. Aesthetically, I love them. So, why did teenage Kat stop wearing one? Well, I hated the fact that the enjoyment of my life was so based around this thing on my arm.

We’d go on a night out and everyone would constantly be checking their watches to see how long we had left. To me, that stops you living in the present.  So, with my teenage ideals,  I decided to stop wearing one and I started  just thinking that the time I had was the time I had. Whether it was 30 minutes or 3 hours, I wouldn’t have anything to constantly check (I didn’t have a mobile until I was 19), so all I could do was enjoy it! That’s something that’s stuck with me. Perhaps also why I hate planning too far in advance. It’s not why I am often late, but I’ve had time to reflect on that and it’s fast becoming a thing of the past.

Poop and the The Power of Now

It’s very hard not to sound like a total cheeseball when I write about this, but I do feel quite passionate about it. However, I’ve learned that true contentment comes from embracing  the Power of Now and years later my friend Lovette recommended that very book and that was another game changer for me. It’s something I continue to live by. Or, try my best!

In fact, I have a post (in draft – bah, oui) all about that. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not always a natural act and it’s something I have to remind myself of at times. And my life isn’t a Hollywood fairytale. But I’ve accepted and embraced that it’s my fairytale.

And, for now, just know that’s why I might seem like a flakey blogger. That I am. But,  it’s partly because of everything going on, I just needed to take time and smell the roses – even when roses really smell like poo poo poo poo. And as a parent, that rosey life really is covered in poo.

Quality Time

So, yes, I’ve needed to take time to get used to it all and make sure I’m not too exhausted to remain sane! As a working mum, it’s become even more important for me to spend quality time with my boy – we just don’t have that 24:7 contact we had when I was on mat leave (sob!).

I have been writing and recording videos here and there, but I just haven’t been able to finish all the drafts and hit ‘post’. But, I’ve had a kick from blogger extraordinaire, Aby at You Baby Me Mummy and I’m going to work on those 90+ drafts I’ve got. I promise you!

I love creating content and I miss it, so I am back. Yay. I am going to make time.

I’ve also had time to book my first holiday on my own post-baby. Yes, whilst B is enjoying a few days with his dad, I’m off to Malta with my partner in crime and B’s godmother and we’ll be staying at the Corinthia Spa Hotel. So exciting. I know I’ll be on FaceTime daily, but B will be having a ball and so I’ll be doing my best to make the most of every morsel of time to myself I have. Even if that’s catching up on some sleep!

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